I Don't Believe It
by jessmm315
Summary: Puck knows better than to believe she is dead
1. Prologue

Dear Dads,

Don't be alarmed. I just went to Grandma's. Looking back on my time at school, I decided it was time for a change. If anyone asks, you guys don't know where I am. Please? Just for a little while. A few month tops. Grandma lives close by so I will be attending school. You can call and visit still but I'm trying out an experiment for school so my appearance will be… unusual. What you guys don't know is that I have been bullied all of high school. Don't panic, I have it under control. Or I will soon. That is where the school project comes in. I have permission from the school. The principal and teachers know I am really Rachel Berry, but will pretend I am a new student. I will soon be known as Mia Kahbs. Promise you won't freak out. Trust me, after this experiment I think the high school will change drastically. I know that I must sound crazy for wanting to do this.

I have answers for the questions I figured you might want to ask.

1. **Won't somebody recognize me?** No. I have everything all planned out. I won't talk at all so nobody will identify my voice. I will always carry a whiteboard with me in case I need to communicate. My appearance head to toe will be different, as I earlier pointed out. I will dye my hair, wear fake glasses, and wear very different clothes. If I can't talk, I can't sing, so I won't be joining glee.

2. **How are you guys supposed to react when people ask you questions?** Just be quiet about it. Say you don't like talking about it. I don't know, you can say anything unsuspicious.

I'm sure you guys have a lot of other questions too, but you can visit grandma's house or call me. You can visit as much as you'd like as long as I'm not exposed. Before you tell me I can't do this, talk to me first. I'm sorry if I sound bratty or demanding, but I think it is very important that I do this. At least think about. I love you guys.

~Rachel Berry (AKA Mia Kahbs)


	2. Letters

**I Don't Believe It**

_AN: I don't own glee or the song._

**PUCK POV**

I silently reread my letter again. This whole letter thing kinda creeps me out.

_Dear Noah, _

_ I just wanted to say thank you. Yes, you used to tease and taunt me. Once you were shown what it was like you immediately stopped. Being slushied, for lack of a better word, sucks doesn't it? You even apologized which I appreciate. I even consider you as my friend even if I am not yours. I honestly have no idea what I'm going to do. Just to be safe, I have a confession to make. Call me crazy, but I regret breaking up with you. I really enjoyed being with you. Anyways, you have amazing potential, Noah. Don't let anyone bring you down. Deny it all you want, but I know Puck is at least partially an act. Please consider showing a little more Noah now and then. You were (are) an amazing friend._

_~Rachel Berry (your hot" little Jewish-American princess)_

I found this in my backpack this morning. I have no idea how the hell it got there and it's annoying. What does it even mean? I looked around at the gleeks. Did anyone else get a letter?

* * *

><p><strong>Narrator POV<strong>

Kurt's eyes widened and he frantically looked around. If not for her handwriting he would have assumed it was the football players playing a prank on him. Unable to resist, he read the letter.

_Dear Kurt,_

_ It didn't start out that way but now I consider you my best friend. Who would've thought your enemy would become your best friend? If only I would have stopped treating you as a threat sooner. You were a fierce competitor I have to admit. Thank you for being my friend Kurt. You have a lot of talent and I know it will be put to use. All I wanted to say was thanks for all the ups and downs of our friendship._

_~Rachel Berry*_

Kurt looked at it with confusion. He didn't understand the point of what she had said. He stuck the letter in his binder and left to meet up with Blaine. The whole way there he kept thinking about the short letter.

* * *

><p><em>Dear Finn,<em>

_ I have something important to tell you. You really were my first love. I wish things had gone differently though. I don't necessarily regret falling in love with you but the whole situation was handled poorly. You have to admit there was too much jealousy, cheating, and problems in general. I'm sorry for all the horrible things I did to you. I don't know why I felt the need to act the way I did sometimes. I am glad to say I finally got over you. I hope you find a great girlfriend who will treat you properly. We deserve to have happiness without all the pain and complications. It is a cliché but I hope we can move on and be friends. I don't want to be hurt anymore Finn. I don't want you to hurt anymore either. Don't worry, I'll be fine._

_~ Rachel Berry_

The letter remained unopened at the bottom of Finn's locker.

* * *

><p>Santana rolled her eyes and went to throw the stupid letter away before even reading it. At least that was the plan. "What the hell Puckerman!" Puck grabbed the letter out of her hands. "Why are you throwing this away?" Santana rolled her eyes. "As if I care what manhands said." She replied inspecting her nails. Puck narrowed his eyes and read the letter.<p>

_Dear Santana,_

_ Remember what you said in the choir room last week Wednesday? The cleaner version was how my existence bothered you and that I was a selfish "puta." I looked it up by the way. I don't know why you couldn't just insult me in English. I looked back at all the teasing I received over the years. All the things anyone ever did or said to hurt me. I came to a conclusion. My existence is bothersome to you? Congratulations! You're problem is fixed_

_~Rachel Berry (te odio, Satan)_

Puck crumpled the paper with his fist. _THAT _was why Rachel was gone. He felt so angry. He felt not only angry, but worried and sad too. He began letting all of his feelings out by yelling at Santana. "What the fuck Satan? How could you do that! What if she's dead? I would kill you right now if you weren't a girl!" Santana was actually a little scared of Puck.

"Would you chill, Puckerman! It's not like I told her to go kill herself." Apparently that was the wrong response. Puck started cussing and yelling at Santana, causing her to scream back. Mr. Schue ran up to them and pulled Puck away. "Why are you guys fighting? This is ridiculous." Puck shook his head and tossed the crumpled letter at Mike. Mike had been standing close by once he heard all of the yelling.

Mr. Schue released him and Puck glared at Santana before leaving the school.

* * *

><p><strong>In Glee Club<strong>

Glee club was buzzing with accusations and guesses on what actually happened to Rachel Berry. "I bet she's dead." Mike stated. "No, I just can't picture Rachel committing suicide." Mercedes argued. The group kept discussing their thoughts. Santana sat off in the corner with Brittany. They were having their own conversation. "Do you think I killed her?" Brittany looked at Santana with a 'duh!' look. "No, Rachel killed herself." Santana tried again. "Do you think what I said pushed her into killing herself?" Brittany looked somewhat thoughtful. "I dunno, Santana. Maybe."

Finn sat in his seat not sure what to think. At this point he still hadn't read Rachel's letter to him. Mr. Schue walked in at that moment. He spent most of the time trying to shut everybody up. He was unsuccessful and gave up and told everyone to go home.

* * *

><p>The next day went painfully slow for Puck. He wanted to confront everybody in glee and see if anyone else got a letter from Rachel. He was still pissed at Santana so avoided her. Eventually, he headed to glee. He got nothing from everyone except Kurt. Kurt looked at him for a while before slightly nodding. Now he knew that Santana, Kurt, and he got letters from Rachel.<p>

He hated to admit it, but he was a little nervous. He wanted to perform a song for Rachel in front of everybody. He refused to think of her as dead, but this song made it sound like he did. He heard this song in a store the other day and decided it would be perfect to sing. As he was standing up there he decided to explain himself.

"I don't think Rach is dead. I heard this song and guess it fits so I am gonna sing it."

"It must've been in a place so dark you couldn't feel the light  
>Reachin' for you through that stormy cloud<br>Now here we are gathered in our little hometown  
>This can't be the way you meant to draw a crowd<p>

Oh, why? That's what I keep askin'  
>Was there anything I could have said or done?<br>Oh, I had no clue you were masking  
>A troubled soul, God only knows what went wrong<br>And why you'd leave the stage in the middle of a song

Now in my mind I keep you frozen as a seventeen year old  
>Roundin' third to score the winning run<br>You always played with passion no matter what the game  
>When you took the stage, you shined just like the sun<p>

Oh, why? That's what I keep askin'  
>And was there anything I could have said or done?<br>Oh, I had no clue you were masking  
>A troubled soul, oh, God only knows what went wrong<br>And why you'd leave the stage in the middle of a song

Now the oak trees are swayin' in the early autumn breeze  
>The golden sun is shining on my face<br>The tangled thoughts I hear a mockingbird sing  
>This old world really ain't that bad a place<p>

Oh, why? There's no comprehending  
>And who am I to try to judge or explain?<br>Oh, but I do have one burning question  
>Who told you life wasn't worth the fight?<br>They were wrong, they lied, and now you're gone, and we cried

'Cause it's not like you to walk away in the middle of a song  
>Your beautiful song, your absolutely beautiful song."<p>

The faces of the gleeks were all sad as they clapped. Mr. Schue got up next to Puck. "That was great, Puck. I think that everyone should sing a song to express their feelings for these next couple of days."

Once glee ended Santana came up to Puck. "I need to talk to you for a sec." Puck shrugged and waited for her to begin.


End file.
